Cursed
by WinchesterPhantom
Summary: Response to 'The Greatest Mistake' - "If they didn't get shot, they just left..." Mike Logan remembers the night Carolyn Barek left him. MC


**_Edited:_**_ 19/9/08_

**Cursed**

**Disclaimer:** No I do not own them. They belong to Wolfie (please Wolfie bring our Caro home! AT least for one ep!)

**Summary:** Response to 'The Greatest Mistake' - "If they didn't get shot, they just left..." Mike Logan remembers the night Carolyn Barek left him. MC

**Author's Notes:** I was talking to Penn and she commented I should do a Logan P.O.V to the 'Greatest Mistake' and I couldn't agree more. Hope I do this justice. Also this is slightly more...how do I put it? Well it's more intense then the Greatest Mistake - blame it on watching Sex and the City last night (why won't Big just admit to Carrie that he loves her? WHY!?). Also this has not been beta'd and I do not speak Polish.

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If they didn't get shot, they just left...

He didn't know if he hated her for it. He could easily; she had just left, point blank with no warning. She had broken that promise she made after the Garret case. She had broken it - though he should have known she would have. He should've known better then to trust her like that.

It was unfair really, the moment he found his dream girl, she left without so much of a glass slipper. But life wasn't a fairytale - there weren't always going to be happy endings but he had hoped...

He could still remember the day when Deakins had partnered him with her. He'd requested a partner - not wanting to follow Goren and Eames around like some groupie for the rest of his time at MCS. And Deakins had found her for him. When he first met her, he had been slightly worried it wouldn't work. She was quiet, and so observant - almost like a female version of Goren.

And she was beautiful - literally.

He'd had a female partner before but Silvera hadn't been beautiful. Good looking yes, but Caro was in a league of her own. She captivated him, with her long dark waves, chocolate brown eyes, and smooth tanned skin. She was his dream girl.

But she was his partner and he needed to push aside all those emotions and not fall for her. He couldn't risk being sent back to the Island. He couldn't go to Deakins and asking for a new partner on the sole basis that he was extremely attracted to her.

But that didn't stop him from trying to get to know her.

He pursued her for vague details of her life; he knew that her cousin, Rosie, was a marriage counselor that had been through three divorces, that her father had been the cook ever since her mother had nearly killed him when they first came to New York by cooking chicken, that Caro had her own vegie garden, that every summer since she could remember her Nana would fly over from Italy to see her, and that when she was seventeen she had snuck out to a party and ended up having to have the cops pick her up (that story seemed strangely familiar). He never asked about her love life though, not sure how he could cope with the thought of another man with her.

So he tried to become her big brother. If he thought of her as his kid sister then surely there would be no issues. It worked - a bit. They goofed around, fought like siblings, and were making Deakins hairline recede at an amazing rate but at the end of the day he never saw her as a sister. And it killed him...

Was he cursed or something? Doomed to an endless game of musical partners? He must be, because the instant he made love to his Caro, she left.

The shit had hit the fan one night when Caro had come over for one of their nightly activities. They didn't have any cases so they found themselves channel surfing whilst waiting for pizza. Eventually he had settled on 'America's Next Top Model'.

The argument had started then. They both weren't really in it, just searching for a distraction from their growling stomachs. The pizzas soon arrived, and when he asked the pizza kid if he thought ANTM was objectifying women, she'd rolled her eyes and stalked back to the lounge room.

"I can't believe you brought some kid into it," she had growled at him. He'd grinned and put the box down on the coffee table.

"You just can't stand to lose babe," he retorted, slipping next to her.

She stared at him for a full three minutes.

"You did not just call me _babe_,"

He raised an eyebrow, "I do believe I get bragging rights for winning,"

"You didn't win!"

"Did so!"

"Did not!"

And soon they were off again. He loved it when Caro got angry. She got this cute little flush, and random Polish words would slip into the conversation. For someone who kept their emotions under wraps, he liked to see what Caro was really like. Even if it meant he had to be scared to death.

Suddenly Caro was up, yelling, hands flailing around, and before he knew it he was up, his neck bent, his lips meeting hers. She fell against him, and he held her up, pulling her closer to him, unwillingly to let her go. He'd never let her go...

She broke apart, and he stepped back. Shit, he hadn't just? No...fuck...he couldn't think - he needed to apologise...he knew it...shit, what had he done? What the fuck had he done? He'd just thrown away a partnership...he'd thrown away the best thing ever...

He smiled softly, wondering if he could still joke it off...oh shit! He'd screwed up so -

She kissed him.

She wanted him.

And he wanted her.

And that was enough.

His arms wrapped around her petite frame, and he lifted her up, and began to walk to his bedroom. Her mouth had left his, and was now roaming his neck. He reached his bed, and gently lay her there, before climbing on top of her, his right hand exploring his partner's body, his kisses deepening.

Once upon a time, Lennie Briscoe had commented on how youth didn't understand sex, they didn't understand it was a form of art, that it wasn't about just sticking your dick somewhere, that it was about pleasure and passion.

Mike knew at that moment what he had meant.

He was slow, gentle almost, and he took his time, not rushing things. He wanted it to be special - because she deserved it.

_"Kocham was..."_ she had mumbled against his neck. He pulled back for a moment, surveying her flushed face, and gently pushed aside her long hair.

"Means _I love you_ in Pol..."

He leaned in and she melted under him, a soft moan escaping.

Eventually they just lay there, Mike spooning Caro, his arms wrapped around her body. She was drifting off into sleep, and he watched her for moment, nuzzling into her shoulder blades. She sighed, and he held her tighter.

This was a blessing.

He didn't care that he had crossed the line because for once he was in heaven - he never wanted this moment to end. So he just lay there and held on...

But she slipped away...

Just like every other partner he'd had - she left. But she left so abruptly. He woke up and she was gone, and little did he realise then that when he went to work that she truly had gone. She'd just left, for another job, for another city.

And he hated her for that, hated her for prolonging this curse especially since she'd nearly broken it.

This curse of loneliness.

**_Fin_**

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**Author's Note:** I don't write sex...that much is obvious...anyway did you all enjoy it? Or did I completely mutilate our beloved Logan and Barek? Also the promise mentioned after the Garret case is tied to my ITWSH Post-ep, and the Caro sneaking out thing is tied to my fic 'A Knight in Uniform'.


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